Mum saw the medics yesterday and her cancer is incurable. So I am entering the surreal zone where you confront the fact that your parents are not going to last forever, that words need to be said and plans made.
Mum's mantra remains that I should not get upset and I cannot do that for her. How can I not cry for a woman who has given me so much? I have decided to stop drinking in the coming weeks and months as I need to be strong for her and other family members.
Did I tell you that my mum is amazing? She remains so in her ultimate crisis. She feels she has had a good life particularly since marrying my dad in 1950. She mentioned her grandchildren and her many good memories and stated "how lucky am I!". That on the day she is told she is dying!
There is some sort of subtle irony in her hearing this news on the day Wendy Richard died from the same disease. Like Pauline Fowler, Mum has that mix of passionate defence of her family with care for others in the community. She also has a cracking pair of legs just like Miss Brahms!
The title of this blog now will seem odd to those who do not know my mum. However, she will party through her remaining days looking after us all, making it easier for us all and packing in lots of fun along the way.
I hope in time I am even half the woman that she is.